Dear friends,
Once a month at St Ethelburga’s, our team comes together to reflect on some of the most polarising issues of our time. Each session is led by a team member who researches and presents a topic — usually something that feels difficult, awkward or perhaps even completely outrageous to talk about. For a few hours on a Monday afternoon, we try to encounter the issue from the perspectives of some of the most polarised groups in our society.
When we began this process, I thought I understood the perspectives of those I disagree with quite well. I work at a peacebuilding centre, after all — with a particular focus on depolarisation. Surely, I should be well versed.
But as I began to reach across the divide, beyond my fear and my pity, and allow myself to sink into that dark, murky pool of the unknown, I found the encounter dizzying. Each time I entered this unfamiliar place, something in me instinctively recoiled. I longed for the familiarity of dry land: to stand safely at the edge and look only at the surface.
To understand someone, in the fullest sense, asks more of us than processing their ideas. It asks us to stand, however briefly, in the world as they experience it. I had not been prepared for what can happen when we genuinely try to inhabit another person’s perspective. I certainly hadn’t anticipated how it might challenge, complicate or even undermine some of my own strongly held views.
Perhaps because genuine understanding can unsettle us, we have replaced it with something safer: the ability to recognise another person’s argument without allowing their experience to disturb our own. But when we stop risking this deeper encounter, it becomes easier to retreat into groups of people who already see the world as we do.
From within those groups, calls for unity and togetherness can sound hopeful while leaving the deeper divide untouched. Too often, they mean drawing closer to those on our side against a particular group or ‘other’. The question, then, is not simply how we come together, but whether we can do so without needing someone else to remain outside the circle.
This question sits at the heart of our depolarisation training, where participants practise staying curious, speaking honestly and navigating deep disagreement without losing sight of one another’s humanity. We wanted to explore it more widely, bringing together experienced peacebuilders and bridge-builders to reflect on what togetherness might mean in this moment.
On Wednesday 30 September, we will be joined by Jo Berry (Building Bridges for Peace), Ali Alma (Solutions Not Sides), Sean Ryan (UK Welcomes Refugees) and Clare Martin (St Ethelburga’s), with Elizabeth Oldfield (The Sacred) as moderator, for Towards a Radical Centre: What Does It Mean to Be Together Now? Together, they will explore how we might build a form of unity that does not require uniformity. How can we step away from outrage, censorship and echo chambers, and cultivate the skills needed to remain in relationship across profound disagreement? We would love you to join us. You can book your place here, and watch our latest video, Depolarisation and Deep Ecology, on YouTube now.
If you are looking for something more hand-on, applications are now open for Lifelines group leaders! If you are part of a faith, community or cultural group, we invite you to join us in planting hedgerows and wildlife corridors across the UK, while bridging divides across communities and deepening our relationship with the natural world. Apply by 14 August to join our 2026/27 planting season.
Looking further ahead, our autumn programme begins with Contemplative Practice on 8 September, Open Day Open House Festival 2026 on the 15th, and our Depolarisation Training on the 25th.
October brings Facilitation Training, Embodied Peace: Working with Grief in Communities, Non-Violent Communication & Conflict Transformation, and Remembering Earth: A Lecture with Emmanuel Vaughan-Lee.
In November, we will host our three-day Holding a Radical Centre depolarisation intensive, followed by Conflict Coaching, which is also available online. You can explore the full programme and book your place here.
We look forward to seeing you soon!
With all warmest wishes,
Harriet Terrill
Events & Communications Co-ordinator